Introduction: Young People Need More Than Criticism
There has been important movement in recent years toward elevating women’s voices, recognizing a diversity of gender identities, and creating space for people whose experiences have too often been overlooked.
That work is important, and there is much more to do.
At the same time, I think we need to ask another question: What does healthy, positive masculinity actually look like?
It is relatively easy to identify the problems associated with toxic masculinity. We can talk about aggression, emotional isolation, rigid expectations, dominance, and the pressure boys and men can feel to hide vulnerability.
But identifying what is harmful is only part of the work.
Young people also need positive examples. Boys need opportunities to understand that strength does not require emotional silence, that courage can include vulnerability, and that caring for others is not a weakness. They need to see pathways toward a healthy sense of identity and belonging.
This is an emerging conversation, and I am encouraged by the possibilities.
Making Space for Women's Voices and Gender Diversity
One positive development has been a growing willingness to center and amplify women's voices.
For generations, many systems and institutions have given greater authority and visibility to men's experiences while minimizing or excluding women's perspectives. Creating space for empowered women's voices is an important part of building healthier communities.
We are also seeing greater recognition of the diversity of gender identities and experiences.
That work matters because people need to see themselves reflected in the conversations that shape their lives. When we make room for a broader range of voices and experiences, we create opportunities for people to understand themselves and one another more fully.
This is especially important in Indigenous communities, where conversations about gender and identity can benefit from attention to both contemporary experiences and the diversity found within Native American history and Indigenous cultures.
There is still much work ahead, but the direction is encouraging.
Moving Beyond an Analysis of Toxic Masculinity
Another important conversation has been the analysis of toxic masculinity.
Understanding harmful patterns is necessary. We need to be able to recognize when cultural expectations teach boys and men that they must always be tough, dominant, emotionally distant, or unwilling to ask for help.
But there is a danger if our conversation stops there.
If we tell young men only what not to be, we have not necessarily shown them what they can become.
We need to move from critique toward possibility.
Instead of simply saying, "Don't be toxic," we should be able to say:
Here is what healthy masculinity can look like.
Here is what it can look like when a boy is struggling.
Here is what it can look like when he experiences grief, disappointment, fear, failure, or uncertainty.
Here is what it can look like to ask for help.
Here is what it can look like to care deeply about other people while still having strength and confidence.
Those examples can give young people something constructive to move toward.
What Does Healthy Masculinity Look Like?
Healthy masculinity does not require abandoning strength. It asks us to reconsider what strength means.
A healthy man can be strong and compassionate.
He can be confident without needing to dominate others.
He can be courageous enough to acknowledge fear.
He can care for his family and community.
He can listen.
He can apologize.
He can express emotion.
He can ask for help.
He can stand up for someone else.
He can understand that his worth is not determined by whether he is the strongest person in the room.
These qualities are not weaknesses. They are forms of strength.
For boys navigating adolescence and adulthood, having positive models of masculinity can be incredibly important. Young people are constantly asking, explicitly or implicitly, Who am I? How should I behave? What does it mean to become an adult? Where do I belong?
We should give them answers that create possibility rather than confinement.
Indigenous Perspectives on Identity and Belonging
Indigenous cultures have much to contribute to these conversations.
Native American history demonstrates that Indigenous communities have always contained complex systems of relationships, responsibilities, identities, and roles. Indigenous cultures should not be reduced to a single contemporary definition of gender or masculinity.
The diversity of Indigenous experiences is important.
For Ojibwe people, cultural teachings emphasize relationships and responsibilities to family, community, ancestors, the natural world, and future generations. These relationships can provide a broader framework for understanding identity.
Who we are is not only about how we define ourselves as individuals. It is also about how we relate to the people and world around us.
That perspective can be especially valuable when thinking about boys and young men. Instead of defining masculinity primarily through individual achievement, power, or competition, we can ask how a young person contributes to the wellbeing of others.
What kind of brother will he be?
What kind of father, uncle, grandfather, friend, neighbor, or community member might he become?
How will he use his strengths in service to others?
These questions create a different pathway toward adulthood.
Indigenous Education Can Create New Possibilities
Education has an important role to play in these conversations.
Indigenous education should include Native American history and contemporary Indigenous perspectives, but it can also create space for deeper questions about identity, relationships, responsibility, and belonging.
Young people need more than information. They need relationships and models that help them understand how knowledge applies to their lives.
For boys in particular, educators, families, mentors, and communities can help demonstrate that emotional intelligence, empathy, cooperation, and cultural connection are essential forms of strength.
The Ojibwe language can also be part of this work. Language carries cultural knowledge and ways of understanding relationships. Supporting Ojibwe language revitalization is therefore not simply about preserving vocabulary. It is part of maintaining a living cultural framework that can help future generations understand who they are and how they relate to others.
Giving Boys a Path Forward
One of the most exciting possibilities is giving boys a positive vision of who they can become.
A young person going through difficult circumstances may not need another lecture about what is wrong with society. He may need someone to show him another way.
He needs people who can say:
You can be strong without being cruel.
You can be confident without putting someone else down.
You can be vulnerable without being weak.
You can care about people without losing yourself.
You can make mistakes and learn from them.
You can ask for help.
You can use your strengths to make your family and community stronger.
That is the kind of positive masculinity we should be working toward.
Building Communities Where Everyone Belongs
The conversation about masculinity cannot be separated from the larger conversation about belonging.
Women need their voices heard.
People of diverse gender identities need to be seen and respected.
Boys and men also need healthy pathways for understanding who they are.
These are not competing goals.
We do not have to choose between supporting one group and supporting another. A healthier community makes room for all of us to become more fully human.
When we create space for different experiences and identities, we strengthen the possibility of genuine connection.
That is the larger opportunity before us: not simply identifying the ways people have been harmed, but creating the relationships, cultural teachings, and positive examples that help people heal and thrive.
Recommended Resources
The Cultural Toolbox — Explore how cultural knowledge can provide practical tools for identity, relationships, resilience, and community life.
The Language Warrior's Manifesto — Learn more about Indigenous languages, language revitalization, and the connection between language and cultural identity.
Ojibwe Language Resources — Explore resources for learning and reconnecting with the Ojibwe language.
Anton Treuer Speaking Engagements — Learn more about presentations focused on Indigenous education, Native American history, cultural understanding, identity, and belonging.
Anton Treuer on YouTube — Watch additional conversations and teachings on Indigenous culture, language, education, and community.